My Human Dilemma

balancing - September 6, 2009

Once more, my dream world speaks of a human dilemma.

Or, at least, this human’s dilemma.

In a recent dream…

…I’m paddling about a broad pool of water, just beneath the spillage of a small dam. 

A friend goes into the wood beyond the dam, so I’m all alone.

I’m able to keep afloat by holding onto a block of wood.  So I can relax. 

But I realize that, at any moment, people may come and destroy my peaceful solitude.  That thought brings up ambivalent feelings.

As in this dream, so in waking life: what would be a perfect scene is weighed by thoughts of what might happen.

But would the arrival of people be so bad?  Depends on the people, I guess.  This setting is so quiet.  Ironically, those who come to such a place often show little respect for what makes it special.

Don’t get me wrong—though I value my solitude, I love people.  I can be as social as a honey bee.  I like conversing with strangers and even friends.  I want to know how the rest of the world lives…

And yet, solitude can be so sweet.  So what’s the answer?

First of all, I shouldn’t ruin the moment by worrying about what doesn’t yet exist.  Anticipation can be such a burden.  I already know that, and yet, it’s good to be reminded, because I often forget.  Awareness is key.  That’s the main reason I follow my dreams.

As for the conflict of seeking solitude versus being more socialable…

…I know I need to create a better balance.  But I also realize that balance is not a static state.  We all work to maintain balance in various areas of life.  Sometimes I may tilt a little too far one way…

…then pull myself back the other way—though in doing so, I often go too far in the other direction.

A year ago, I might have looked upon such a dream problem as something to be solved, resolved, satisfied.  Now I look on it as something that is part of the human condition—a dilemma shared by many.  A problem to be worked on, sure.  But a situation that I may never resolve completely.

© 2009, Michael R. Patton
sky rope (subterranean rappel):
taking new steps:


About Michael Patton

I am a poet, novelist, and fabulist...A new mythologist, a peace miller, a dream worker...I don't qualify as an illustrator or photographer--I just "make pictures"...I have thirteen books available at amazon... I currently reside in northwest Arkansas, but have lived and worked all over the United States... I'm self-taught, for the most part--which is like searching for the right door in the dark. It's an on-going process.... I don't want to write MY story, I want OUR story, so that's what I'm studying: the human story: past, present, future, in its many aspects--including the spiritual. I'm proceeding at a slow crawl.... I don't see the inner world and outer world as separate. By learning about myself, I learn about others, I learn about my world.... Conversely, as I struggle to understand what I see OUT THERE, I learn about myself.... But to be clear: I don't claim any special understanding. I'm still purblind, still only half-awake.... After frustrating experience with the publisher of my first novel, I've published on my own, beginning with e-books, with plans to move into print and audio. Even video.... Along with a second novel, I've now published eight books of poetry. Each poetry book focuses on a theme. For instance, the collection GLORIOUS TEDIOUS TRANSFORMATION is about the slow difficult wonderful process of change.... In that book, as with all my work, I try to be accessible to a general audience, while also striving to achieve a certain literary quality.
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